I need to figure out a way to change my perceptions of the words "spirituality," "God," "Church" and "ministry" because every time I hear or read those words, I cringe because I'm taken straight back to childhood and Christianity and instantly put up a mental blockade.
I wonder how to break through those things? Or if it really matters.
All those words that hit your buttons, they are just words. Your buttons are wounds in your psyche, they are unresolved and painful, and will continue to cause you pain. Buttons, as I call them, are customized projects for each of us in adulthood. The enlightened person doesn't have any buttons left, they have all been worn down, processed away, de-fused. There is no way to hurt that person with symbols of something that happened in the past. But for those of us with buttons (and I certainly have my share), we are easy to trigger, and easy to hurt.
How to defuse a button? Exposure is one way. If you hit a button hard enough, enough times, eventually it stops causing such a strong response, because we just burn out. There are gentler ways. Awareness is (as usual) the first step. Rumination, cogitation, investigation, research, these are all parts of the processing that helps us bring the unconscious pain and negative associations to the surface, where we can apply rational thought to it. But even this doesn't always heal the emotional wound. And at the deepest level, it is healing that finally does the work. How it happens is a mystery to me. I'll let you know if I figure it out.
I have recently gotten really clear about a couple of my buttons. I absolutely hate being told what to do by a person who has no real authority over me. And I react with a flamethrower when a man tries to "help" me and I don't need his help, and even worse if the "help" gets in my way. There's some deep stuff underlying those exaggerated reactions, and I'm cogitating on all that.
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liveonearth) wrote2010-09-07 09:40 am
no subject
I need to figure out a way to change my perceptions of the words "spirituality," "God," "Church" and "ministry" because every time I hear or read those words, I cringe because I'm taken straight back to childhood and Christianity and instantly put up a mental blockade.
I wonder how to break through those things? Or if it really matters.
no subject
How to defuse a button? Exposure is one way. If you hit a button hard enough, enough times, eventually it stops causing such a strong response, because we just burn out. There are gentler ways. Awareness is (as usual) the first step. Rumination, cogitation, investigation, research, these are all parts of the processing that helps us bring the unconscious pain and negative associations to the surface, where we can apply rational thought to it. But even this doesn't always heal the emotional wound. And at the deepest level, it is healing that finally does the work. How it happens is a mystery to me. I'll let you know if I figure it out.
I have recently gotten really clear about a couple of my buttons. I absolutely hate being told what to do by a person who has no real authority over me. And I react with a flamethrower when a man tries to "help" me and I don't need his help, and even worse if the "help" gets in my way. There's some deep stuff underlying those exaggerated reactions, and I'm cogitating on all that.
no subject